Stop Chasing A Relationship...
Here's why...
I’m lying on the floor right now.
Exhausted.
Gas tank completely empty.
Staring at the ceiling… thinking.
Thinking about how lost people are.
You know, I was at the gym earlier.
And I overheard some guys talking about relationships.
Acting all confident like they deserve one.
Like they’re entitled to love… as if a girlfriend will suddenly fix their broken lives.
And it hit me…
That’s how so many people think.
Chasing relationships like they’re some magical cure.
Like a partner is going to erase the emptiness they feel inside.
And it’s delusional.
On one side, you’ve got the hopeless romantics, obsessed with finding “the one.”
On the other, you’ve got incels, angry at the world because no one wants them.
But I’m not even here to talk about either.
The point is this:
Most people want relationships for the wrong reasons.
They think it’ll save them.
They think a partner will make them feel whole.
They think someone else will magically make their life meaningful.
But it doesn’t work like that.
We chase girls. We chase guys.
We pedestal them. We fantasize. We obsess.
Because deep down..
we think they’ll heal us.
We think they’ll fix the pain.
We think they’ll make us happy.
But here’s the brutal truth… they won’t.
A relationship isn’t a solution to your brokenness.
It’s not a substitute for purpose. Or peace. Or self-respect.
And honestly, I don’t get how people are even thinking about “getting a partner”.
When they haven’t even become someone worth being with.
Let me ask you something:
Do you even love yourself?
Because most people don’t.
They can’t even take care of themselves.
Can’t wake up on time.
Can’t stick to a routine.
Can’t control their urges.
Can’t look in the mirror without lying.
And yet they think they’re ready to give love?
How?
You can’t even show up for YOU.
but you think you’re ready to show up for someone else?
It doesn’t work like that.
You want love before you’ve earned respect.
You want loyalty before you’ve built character.
You want someone to hold you down but you can’t even hold yourself up.
You don’t want love. You want escape.
You want a therapist you can sleep with.
You want someone to mask the void so you don’t have to deal with your own darkness.
That’s why people break when their partner leaves.
Because they never had a relationship.
they had a distraction.
And when it’s gone, they’re left with the same broken mess they were before.
And maybe that’s exactly what they need.
To sit in silence.
Alone.
With no one to distract them from who they really are.
You think love will save you?
No. You save you.
Fix your mind.
Fix your habits.
Fix your finances.
Fix your self-talk.
Fix your f**king identity.
Then maybe…
Just maybe…
you’ll be ready to give someone else your heart.
But until then?
You’re just a liability in someone’s life.
So become someone worth loving.
Otherwise, don’t complain when no one wants to love you.
As always,
I’ll leave you to it.
- soul